Lost in the Feeling video coming soon

And i willed that my motives would be changing
But the pull from my pain has got me straining
And the way that you’re moving’s got me waiting
For a chance to come over and explain it

Everything is blurry now
I could get you on your back and lay it down yeah
In my head it’s too damn loud
I just wanna hear your girl and you scream out, yeah

This isn’t who I want to be
Blaming all my bad decisions on GAD, but
Sixty minutes of ecstasy
Is my only substitution for finding peace

And the sea grows
And the sea grows

And the sea grows
And the sea grows

And the sea grows
And the sea grows

And the sea grows
And the sea grows

(and the sea grows
And the sea grows)

(and the sea grows
And the sea grows)

Funny how i always thought that i knew ya
Only love me when i screw up
If i’m high we could chill tho
Avoid problems that are real
Oh girl
When you mess with me
Yeah
You make a mess that we don’t
Have time to go deal with
You’re just fun
And i have a mental illness
But

We live
We learn
We love

It’s the beginning for us
It’s the beginning for us

Yeah...

And the sea grows

 one of my first real fans... wild

one of my first real fans... wild

 this is what spotify for artists  looks like when you first put out a release (on the mobile app, at least)

this is what spotify for artists  looks like when you first put out a release (on the mobile app, at least)

A savior and a gun; who’s playing
Take everything I say and write it down

Not enough of misery
If it doesn’t make him fear his memories

Get myself a chance to break him
Help me give myself a chance at breaking down
Too long since I’ve let it out

Help me close my eyes and burn this down

It’s easy to be the jury
Reckon i’d do what I have to
Until he felt what you had to
I’m making sense -
It’s not so wild of me to want this
Even I know it’s misguided
Destroying him won’t revive it
I’ll have faith in judgment come

Leave him in your memories
But the past is played out in front of me
Who am I to explain it
Who am I to come raining down

It rips a fire from in the core of me
And behind the smoke i can’t see anything
Who am I to restrain it
This one mistake couldn’t let me down

What difference does it make
When there’s never a chance to find out what I’d do
At what point can I create
A bigger wall in front of all of these distractions
Cuz I’ve been digging in the past to find you
And it’s not so easy to leave
And oh God why is he free
After he’s fucked up everything

(you would feel so much better)
(you would feel so much better)
(you would feel so much better)
(you would feel so much better)

And you turned her upside down

Leave him in your memories
But the past is played out in front of me
Who am I to explain it
Who am I to come raining down

It rips a fire from in the core of me
And behind the smoke i can’t see anything
Who am I to restrain it
This one mistake couldn’t let me down



Just breathe
I’m right here with you

Trust me
It will get easier in time

Just breathe

Just breathe

Just breathe

IMG_5861.jpg
 the setup

the setup

 surprise

surprise

Hope’s in the change
In a future that’s not the same
But what if I can’t believe
That I can grow out of feeling so damn lonely

I need pain
It’s the way I cope with never
Feeling anything

If i run away
From the antidote
Doesn’t mean i don’t wanna get better

When you look at me
Do you find the things
That are yelling out I’m lost in the feeling

So breathe me in
While I’m still here
I can be your everything
For a few minutes dear

Cuz I need it
Never felt so defeated
Haven’t slept I’m not eatin

And I’m just lost in the feeling

That it’s not getting better

That I’ll be like this forever

I’m just lost in the feeling

That it’s not getting better

Swing my arms in the darkest room

To fight truth

It’s not getting any better

It’s not getting any better


Cuz i’ve been running out of steam for this shit
Every dream I could dream is baseless
And is it wrong to want a life
That makes me feel less like i want to die

Cuz I need it
Never felt so defeated
Haven’t slept I’m not eatin

And I’m just lost in the feeling

If i run away
From the antidote
Doesn’t mean i don’t wanna get better

When you look at me
Do you find the things
That are yelling out I’m lost in the feeling

That it’s not getting better

That I’ll be like this forever

I’m just lost in the feeling

That it’s not getting better

Swing my arms in the darkest room

To fight truth

It’s not getting any better

It started at a young age
Even before she could walk
Her poor mom was helpless
From the onslaught
Of her dad
And every day at grade school
She wouldn’t eat her lunch
Said her stomach hurt
Cause she had to return
To a place that was hardly home
She needed love
(she needed love)

First went the TV
Then he smashed in the car’s windows
So she covered her ears and cried in bed
Waiting for it to end
The next day at school
The teacher asks why she’s sleeping
They all just laugh at the girl
Whose eyes keep leaking
She needed love

(she needed love)
(she needed love)
(she needed love)
(she needed love)

It gets darker after 16
When her old man settles in
He’s unemployed but the money’s in
From her mom to buy his gin
She tiptoes in after work
Hoping her dad’s not awake
But the light flips on
And his hand’s too strong
To resist under his weight

But she’s one hell of a girl
She’ll pay for school and she’ll raise a boy
She’ll grow up
To become
Everything she could want
And more

She needed love